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March 6, 2001 — 3 PM

The sun is shining, it’s

The sun is shining, it's a balmy 2 °C (that's 35 °F for the Yanks), and for a change the weather in Montreal is nicer than places south. The ridiculously overhyped nor'easter that has swept into New England and New York thoughtfully left our fair city unscathed.

Nevertheless, I've finally realized why Americans think that Canada is such a frozen wasteland. Besides people like me calling 2 °C "balmy," I mean.

Every time it gets vaguely chilly in Boston or Chicago, or when it, god forbid, snows in Texas, the American meteorologists talk about "cool Canadian air" or "a high pressure front moving south from Canada." As if there were a factory in Moose Jaw where quiet, industrious Canadians are working overtime to pump out pure, Canadian ColdAireTM, just to export to the Midwest. While CNN wasn't looking, Southern Ontario turned its air conditioners full blast and aimed them across Lake Ontario and Lake Erie.

And did I mention the Québécois plot to chill New England to make them more sympathetic to the separatist cause?

On my flight from Cleveland to Montreal awhile back, the Nashvillian near me asked, eagerly, "So, when does the snow melt around here? May? June?" The disappointment on his face was actually palpable when I offered the rather pedestrian response of "March."

There are times of course when I curse the wretched St. Lawrence Valley and the fact that Montreal probably is a great deal colder than any other large city on the Earth, except maybe Moscow. But that doesn't mean it's our fault.


Previously: The always knee-slapping Lileks exposes

Subsequently: Take One: Yeah, we’ll, um…

March 2001
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